D&D is fun

Work = productive but still not nice.

D&D was absolutely fucking hilarious this evening. After the battle with the dragon we found ourselves stranded in its cavern with no way out except an apparently bottomless pit. This wasn't such an issue as there was a magic table that made food and a magic cask that made ale. So the suggestion was mooted that we simply stay in the cave and eat, drink, and shit down the bottomless pit for the reset of eternity.

But sadly this idea was not to be, and after some intense, fruitless discussion, we sold all our story points to persuade the DM to allow the most sensible idea we had to go ahead. This was to fashion the dead dragon's skin into parachutes to get down the bottomless pit. It wasn't actually bottomless and after a long trip down a river which involved much swimming, cursing and wishing we'd brought the magic table as a kind of food producing raft, we finally reached the outside world.

Naturally we set up camp, and of course people had to keep watch. First watch was Rob, who noticed some crows in a tree that were staring at the camp. Some arcana from Ed and I showed that they were enchanted, so we decided to attack them. Ed, somehow, managed to use a shock staff he has that never works, and rolled a 20 on his attack that instantly decimated the crows and caused a gigantic lightning storm and fire.

Second watch was Ed, who saw two evil guys coming to find out what the fuck was going on. We managed to capture them and intimidate them for information. The first one, cunningly named A by us, was a hapless 17 year old, who promptly shat himself and blabbed everything in fear of Ed's terrifying intimidation dice roll. The other, B, was 27 and a bit more tough to break but he talked as well after being threatened with a dagger. After a prolonged discussion as to what we were going to do with them afterwards, we decided to knock them out. B was knocked out quite easily but Ed managed somehow to smash the poor crying 17 year old's head in, splattering his brains everywhere.

Somewhat dumbfounded by this, our initial guilt was quickly forgotten as we tried to work out what to do with the body. Cannibalism was quickly dismissed, then we wondered about the possiblity of using the body as a kind of puppet to scare the other guy more once he woke up, or fashioning his internal organs into some sort of message saying sorry he was dead and leave us alone. Eventually we just left in the dead of night, and found a farm where the next adventure begins, hopefully next week.

It's impossible to explain just how fucking funny this all was, and we reduced the poor DM to confusion and dumfoundedness several times as he tried desperately to incorporate our bizarre ideas into his story.

Fuck all that shit in London. However it all started, now they're just being a bunch of cunts.

Not feeling good and it's not all down to work. Just feeling a bit like the odd-one out at the moment, the odd number that makes things a little awkward. It's my own fault but I can't think what the fuck to do about it.